If you’re going to pursue online dating, you need to craft a profile that presents you in the best way possible. Yes, a lot of profiles are filled out by checking boxes or ratings scales. But most have some free writing sections where you get to put yourself forward in your own words. Here, we will guide you through the process of developing a profile that will attract who you want while preserving some of your privacy.

Be careful. It’s very easy to get comfortable with someone who seems to be “right” for you, or to offer personal details in the hope your openness will convince others of your sincerity. Don’t provide an address or phone number in your profile. Don’t reveal your last name, or even your town if avoidable. If opportunity comes to meet, set it up in a public place the first time, each driving separately.

Be honest. It’s no secret there are fake profiles out there. Logic dictates this is foolish, though, because ultimately all lies are uncovered. Even while just seeking dates, but particularly when focusing on long-term relationships, the best success occurs when people reveal their true selves. You can misrepresent yourself for a time, but it will ultimately undo any relationship.

Be conversational. Lists are nice in an item such as this. But when you’re writing about yourself and introducing yourself to someone, you don’t want it to seem like a story outline. Don’t bullet point, don’t list. Answer as though your prospective date has asked you this question from across the table at a coffee shop.

Be attractive. We’re not talking pretty here, necessarily. But hazy images from a desktop video camera, blurry images, extreme closeups or distant pictures where you’re barely visible…they make no sense. They aren’t artsy, they aren’t creative. They simply give the impression that you have something to hide. Don’t do it. Get a nice, clean picture for your main profile image, and you can play around with your secondary images (virtually all dating sites allow for multiple uploads). If you want this done professionally, check out LookBetterOnline.com. This site is totally dedicated to exactly this process.

And one last bit of advice…don’t be afraid if you’re not a good writer. First, a lot of these offer spell checkers. If they don’t, copy it into Microsoft Word or a similar program and spellcheck that way. Second, just say what you feel. Be sincere, be yourself. Because whether in person or online, it’s all about presentation, and it matters. Good luck!